wow

I've just read a previous post on my friend's blog.Wow, why is my heart beating as If I feel so guilty.The writings were not directly stated though.But still ,was I the one? The one that was mention? Can I jump to the conclusion right away? But whatever it is I'll learn from my pass.I'll let it go.I don't want to repeat the past.I want to be a better human.I want to be able to so called bina bentang pertahanan for myself.I must learn not to think of too much about how people would judge me or talk behind my back.Whatever right.

Holidays are almost over.These past few months, I have the chance to know more my religion, Islam.I should have done that ages ago or last year at least because I got confused a lot last year.I keep asking questions which made me go insane.I think too much of what others might think of me.I want to let go of that.I'll do what is right & I won't care what people might talk behind my back.In the end of the day none of that will benefit me anyway.I want to learn more about Islam.I still have a lot to learn.But I'm procrastinating stuffs.I hate that.

It's holiday and I tend to be lazy uh so not cool.Hate that.I want to be able to purify myself.Next month,will be a life changing experience for me.No, not Uni,well that too but besides that.The important thing.I'm always caught up in between.I tend to do more of the wordly live stuff & think & do but in the end what matters the most? I salute to the teens who knows a lot of Islam & how so nice they are.I like it.I want to be like that.I want to be strong.I planted the seeds of love towards Allah & prophet pbuh & it grows but the problem I face is the consistency of it. Sometimes I water them ,sometimes I don't.Why can't I be consistent WHY?? I want to be,please.I want to ;')

Tolonglah hamba-Mu ini Ya Allah.Tabahkanlah hatiku ini.Amin